Off Late..

There have been many incidents, many moments, many situations, many untold things, that kept recurring. They kept recurring, because there was a result that was in the making. Its not difficult for me to say what I want to say to anyone. I just say it. Its not difficult for me to express myself. I would just express myself.

I set out in my life, with a thought of making my career the best thing that I could give my life. I set out 2.5 years back. Little did I then know that things would just get messy, trivial, complicated as time proceeded. I set out thinking that i would have those around me still with me through to the end of my journey.

But things just change. Some momentarily. Some like a slow poison. Some like an impact, and some drastically. I realized that one thing that keeps on ticking irrespective of what happens around, its nothing but time. In my life until now, I did find people who were as good as time and they never stopped what happened around them. How I wish I attain such a phase in my life too. I have a dream and I will hang onto it. For I know, one day, it will be a reality.

Off late, all those thoughts, those motivational thoughts I used to feed myself, those principles I have been maintaining in me, those people I care a lot for, everything just seems to be shattered. I feel cheated in life now. I want to vent out my anger, but I cant. I want to show my hatredness towards certain things, but I prefer not to, as it will cause destruction to me. Its like a weed that is growing in me using my resources that were not meant for it. Off late, I have been changing. The metamorphosis has begun. But I wont let it continue. I want the essence in me to be me and nothing other than me. Off late, the series of battle with myself has begun. Off late, I have realized that if I do not accept loss, I wont be able to enjoy the happiness of a win.