There will be a time..

My friend called me up and said the following:  

" It was magical moment. Seeing her, after having longed to see her for such a long time, was just so magical.

We spoke for a long time, and all the while, we did not speak of what we were required to speak. Somehow, I could just not bring the topic up. I do know that she and I had to talk about it, but knowing what she is going through and what are happening with her at her end, it made me think that me, expressing my feelings or talking about all that I wanted to let her know was just not the right thing to do. As much as I really wanted to talk, which by the way was the thing I had been waiting for a real long time, at that moment, her comfort was prioritized in me. I dont quite know how to say how I feel anymore. Sometimes, its all just not enough.

To not have had a conversation which I probably had a million times in my mind is something that will cause great tempests within me for a long time. I dont like to lie or for that matter pretend. I will be honest. When I wrote the letter to her, I wanted her to know how I felt and wanted to be honest and did not want to be a hypocrite. Over the waiting time so far, there has been, unknowing to me, a feeling of expectation that has grown within me and to combat that, is perhaps the difficult thing I have ever done. Sometimes, certain magical moments are enough to extinguish such expectations, and that is what happened. Yes, I will wait, as long as it takes, but will never force her for anything. That is not me. You know it too. I know how much difficult it is going to be for me, to live a life daily, not knowing when I would see her again. That parting moment, when she began walking away (the most painful moment I have ever lived), I wished time stood still. Man, I never wished that before.

I am neither going to be pessimistic nor going to be optimistic about this. I will just continue to by myself, the way I have always been to her. At the moment, I am not really worried about how things will be at my end, however, I am hoping/wishing/praying that things at her end begin to sort out. Recent times have been real taxing on her and I am worried that she is covered up with things this way. "

All I could reply to him was "I know how that feels."

There are times when all that we can really do is just watch things unfold. There is nothing much we can really do, for all that we could have done, was already done and for all that we would want to do, we will have to wait for the next chance. Its these moments that will always makes me tell myself that someday, it will all be sorted out and eventually, there will be a time that will be mine.